I made a post. I made a post about an hour ago. I pressed publish. It is no where to be seen. This makes Hayley very angry. Almost as angry as it makes me to see that ‘Hayley’ is supposedly not spelt right in the WordPress spell check system. Fuck you
I had this whole post outlining how I’ve felt the last few days. Now I just want to stick it to the man and defy sleep even though I’m flipping exhausted. Go figure
Feel like I’ve evened out a little… touch wood. Actually, touch log, trunk, forest. Lets not be too cautious here. Haven’t had a rotten low the last few days, but have felt productive. Not necessarily in a good way. Waking up being pumped about going and looking at stuff for my aquarium, buying new fish plants etc. Wanting to do all these things except uni work. Wish uni could just close down for a few months while I straighten out my head, so that I can actually focus and get grades I’ll be proud of instead of getting shit ones which fuel the ever present voice of ‘blue Hayley’ in my head. No seriously WordPress, fuck you. ‘WordPress’ is a word but Hayley isn’t??
So not in deepest blues. But I am irritable at times.. like right now. I am about to effing smash this keyboard because I swear I’m pressing the right buttons and it’s coming up with words I didn’t write. Braghrageblah
And I’ve still got all the signs of perky. Caught up with a friend the other day, and while I was happy to hear how she was going all I wanted to do was be the one talking. Venting. Sharing all the shit in my head. There’s too much for me to say and not enough time to say it in.
Maybe the drugs are kicking in for tonights dose, could be why I’m so dopey. Fuck you WordPress. I had this nicely articulated post about an hour ago. You better post this one or so help me…